This month has been one of the most rewarding, stressful, exciting, and exhausting months I have had. I got to be apart of two amazing weddings, and I’m moving into a new apartment. All of that on paper sounds like a great month but the truth is traveling and moving has me in a weird state of being in transition. Going to Florida and Montana was fun but traveling and being in airports can be draining on a person. You live your life out of a suitcase, and you eat crappy airport food, but still try to have interesting Instagram posts that your life is fantastic.
This has been my month. However, along with the opportunity to travel, I also have been apartment hunting and packing. I currently am living out of thirty boxes with the only contents in my freezer being ice cream, artichoke hearts, and popsicles. You pack things you think you won’t need and of course end up needed it. You can’t find the box with the kitchen supplies and decide that you can somehow make spaghetti without a pot and strainer.
With jokes aside this week has been annoying because I don’t have a set schedule. I can’t find anything, and all I want to do is sleep. I feel weirdly nostalgic as I look around my home for the last two years and there aren’t decorations on the wall and dust is everywhere. My roommates are long gone, and the apartment feels empty. On the other side, I know there is a place for me. I signed a new lease, and my new apartment is less than a mile away, but somehow it doesn’t seem real.
Have you ever felt this way with your personal life? I think this is the perfect description of just finishing your undergraduate degree. You have so much you have accomplished, but you have the potential to do so much more. You can’t decide what job to take; a 9 to 5 soul-sucking job or an internship at a non-for-profit that pays you with words of encouragement but is so rewarding. The what is next transition where you honestly have no clue?
Looking at job applications, I feel both under qualified and perfectly qualified for. It is a frustrating time where you have to decide what is next and you actually have no idea what you want. Where does this leave us? How are we to be hopeful? Because we can’t stay where we are, but we don’t know where to go?
Well for me I need to surround myself with people. I need my friends that take my mind off of the fact my life feels all over the place. I need friends who encourage me in my dreams. I need a community of people whom I know I could call them at a moments notice, and they will be there for me. I’m lucky to say that I’m blessed with that community.
This week my friends have been my grounding point. They remind me that I’m not alone and that I’m not the only person experiencing doubt.
This week I have struggled with having alone time with God. My mind feels all over the place, so the idea of sitting down and reading my bible or trying to pray didn’t make sense to me. I thought because I wasn’t centered; I couldn’t possibly find the words to say. Which I really needed the presence of God more than ever this week. The last few days I have been forcing myself to sit and be still with God. A God that is so faithful and loving. I sometimes forget that I don’t have to be put together for God. That He is more than willing to take my life that is in boxes and filled with dust and love every part of it. That He wants to fill my heart with dreams and for me to have prayers that are bold.
If you ask me how is the post-graduate life I would say unbelievable, tiring, fulfilling, stressful, and uncertain. I am not sure what my next steps are, but I’m so blessed not to do it alone. I’m so blessed for all of the friends and family in my life. I’m blessed to have a God that is faithful when I am not.
If you are reading this and you are uncertain of your next steps let me say you are not alone. If you feel discouraged, don’t be. The next stage of your life is full of potential you need to decide how you want to use that potential.
Things to Remember This Week:
1.Your stuff may be in boxes, but your life is more than your stuff.
2. If you are uncertain what is your next life step go back. Go back to people who remind you who you are.
3. Be willing to take a risk.
4. Learn something new.
5. You are loved!
6. Ask for help if you need it.
7. God is Faithful. There is something in your future that He has planned; like me knowing I do have a new apartment, but I don’t have it quite yet.
Verses for This Week:
Colossians 2:6-7 NLT
“So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.”
Hebrews 10:23 NLT
“Let us Hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.”
Call To Action:
Be there for your friends. Don’t feel the need to fill the space with advice but just listen. Do something together that will make new memories.